The Alchemy of Appreciation

There is a process by which all things can be improved.

There is a way to transform any situation into a positive.

There is an emotion which can take any other emotion and flip it around, or strengthen it a hundred-fold.

And everybody has access to it.

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Have you ever noticed how something feels terrible until it doesn’t?

Ever noticed how a set of circumstances can feel as though they will never improve, and you begin to identify an entire piece of your life with struggle?

You feel as though you’ve tried everything, and that the only way to see yourself through to the other side is to grit your teeth and wait it out.

It feels as though we're powerless to change whatever we're facing. We've all been there. Due to injury, illness, a challenging co-worker, a stubborn child, taxes, or a traffic jam.

But then something shifts.

You choose to recognize how much strength whatever adversity you are facing is giving you. You cease the reinforcing of how troubling your sickness is and you set out on a new path, determined for answers. You simply let go of the simmering feelings of animosity toward your colleague, and see them in a whole new light. If so, you’ve already begun to experiment with the alchemy of appreciation.

Finding benefit in that which we perceive to be negative is transformational.

When we appreciate someone or something that challenges us, we choose to transmute the awful state of things into a positive. With a new choice to turn blame into appreciation an opponent to your happiness becomes the person who taught you how to be yourself despite the challenge. Your strength and compassion grow. That serious injury has created a disciple of wellness and patience out of you. That disease taught you the true meaning of self-care, and the power of your body to heal.

Alchemy traditionally refers to the theory that ‘base’ metals, such as lead, could be transformed into ‘noble’ metals such as gold. The process takes that which is common and alters it so that it becomes something beautiful and valuable. We have the same power over our emotions; our mind is the alchemist.

By changing our viewpoint from victimhood, struggle, and blame

to appreciation we can turn any relationship into something which benefits us. A disaster becomes a blessing. Our ‘base’ emotions can become ‘noble’ ones. Which is just another way to say we always have the option to feel better at all times.

Sometimes this jump from despair to the broader view of appreciation feels impossible. Sometimes it feels ridiculous. Sometimes it feels pointless. But it is always an option.

I spent nine years struggling with a physical injury which limited me constantly. Much of that time I did not feel much like myself. Doctors were at a loss, and prescribed standard physical therapy and pain killers. I tried the therapy, but was not interested in constant medication.

After a few years I stopped believing my condition would improve any time soon. I always knew I would recover fully some day, but I spent much of my time focusing on the limitation and struggle of the injury, which reinforced it in my mind. I wouldn’t accept help from others easily, and almost nobody knew of the constant pain I experienced.

Then, because I had tried everything else, I decided to appreciate my injury.

I began thinking about what it had brought into my life, which included a passionate commitment to improving my health so that I gave my body the best possible chance to recover. I had gone from chronic impatience with myself and others to a whole new sense of calm: I had no choice but to learn how to be calm, so that the anxiety my injury caused wouldn't overtake me.

With appreciation, I saw how the limitations of the injury had put me on a path that led me to people, places, and experiences I would not have exchanged for anything. It felt as though a hundred pounds had lifted off of my shoulders.

This opened the door to other new emotions that felt better and better. I marveled at my body's slow but steady process of healing. I chose to inject my mind and body with appreciation rather than stress and hopelessness (let alone medication).

Since the time I was hurt I’ve never felt better. My body isn't 100% healed, but I feel great anyway. I've learned that this condition does not define my experience of my body, or of my life.

Every day I feel the injury, bit by bit, getting smaller.

Appreciation works on anything. It is a powerful tool.

The next time you find yourself feeling stuck try looking for something to appreciate about whatever you’re up against. Consciously choose to seek out an aspect of your situation that causes you to feel positively about it.

Then sit back and watch your circumstances transform into something precious and beautiful.

Much love.

N